Life without television...

It's been a week without watching tv now. Now why, you may ask, have I not watched tv? It's simple, really. I came home last Sunday to find my T.V., PS2, and DVD player not working. I fiddled around with the outlet and that worked. Next was the power strip and there l found the problem. So, partially out of laziness, the television has not been on for the past week. (Sorry Denise Richards and Kathy Griffith, I will not have my brain cells killed by you anymore). Sure, I have a power strip less than ten feet away that DOES work, but why go go through all the trouble.

Why am I writing this, you may ask? Well, it's not to start a turn off the tv revolution. I could not do such a thing. I've learned a lot this week. In honor of David Letterman, I will list ten things I've learned by not watching television this week. (In no particular order.)

1.) The dreams about Denise Richards have stopped. No, not those kind of dreams. The dreams where I'm forced to watch her show over and over again because the only other thing on is Brooke Knows Best. I guess that's what television does.

2.) I've started to breath easier, have better circulation, and am not as tired. Oh, wait, I've confused that with exercising. My bad.

3.) I know way too much about Saved by the Bell. I know more than any average human being should know. Maybe I should have got of the house more in high school.

4.) Without the TV on, I've had a lot more conversations with myself. In fact, I called the cops on myself the other night because I threw my head against the wall. TV really was my friend, and look what I've done.

5.) The internet really doesn't end. I've never spent so much time on the internet before. I now know how to cook a turkey, build a bridge, and play backgammon. I also know how many girls in my area are horny and looking for one on one sex, discreet chats, and sexy emails. Kuna, here I come.

6.) Lists are stupid.

7.) I read War and Peace. Twice.

8.) I found out that a cat isn't really that good of company. Since I didn't watch TV, I actually tried playing with my cat. She just sat there, licked herself, and meowed.

9.) My abs are coming in nicely. I did seven sit-ups and 6 push ups last week.

10.) I reached the end of the internet. Turns out the zebra did it. (Anyone? Anyone? No. Okay. My bad.)

In conclusion, don't turn off the TV. I did watch some at my friends house, but it doesn't count if its on the internet. Because who can honestly pass up a chance to watch the 2007 Fiesta Bowl. FIESTA BOWL!

Until we meet again...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Bromance of Freddie Prinze, Jr. and Matthew Lillard

Counting down the days until Nevada Day

Christmas Letter 2017