Fantasy football season is a upon us, meaning it's time to dole out those tips and tricks to league play.
You've done the hours of prep, poring through constant updates in meaningless preseason games and combing through pages of data. Your draft day (or six) has been scheduled and circled on the calendar.
Let the fantasy football drafting of players you have no control over commence.
All over bars, basements, and backyards, friends are congregating to carefully select their teams. Conspiracy theories are discussed, referees are complained about, and it's hard to find anyone outside of fans of the New England Patriots who actually like Tom Brady (unless, of course, he's used on a high draft pick in your upcoming draft).
The real question: Where do you look to for tips?
Grabbing your nearest newspaper is a cinch. Or perhaps you like to hop in your nearest AOL chat room and discuss strategy with your friends, strangers, and weirdos alike.
I am here today to let you know to look no further for taking care of business in your next edition of fantasy football.
Now, I'm not going to say I'm an expert on the subject or anything, but I have finished in ninth or tenth place -- of a ten-team league -- in each of the last three seasons. And this is in a league I run. ( I leave colluding to presidents!)
I am unable to make guarantees, but the following fantasy football tips are bound to win friends and influence any doubters.
Draft a kicker 1st
Who doesn't love a great kicker? Kickers too often fall in the later round of the most fantasy drafts. However, a good kicker can often be the difference between a make or break season.
Sure, a running back is likely to get you more points by scoring touchdowns. You know what's better than a touchdown? Four field goals!
Taking a kicker like Justin Tucker or Greg Zuerlein with your first overall pick will impress your friends but also help carry your team to victory. Sure, you won't likely earn higher than a 'C' draft grade from Yahoo, but remember: field goal kickers are people, too.
Choose players with cool sounding names
Anyone can choose a Todd Gurley III or Aaron Rodgers with their first pick. When it comes down to it, though, wouldn't you rather have a player with a "cool sounding" name than someone who is going to produce for you? No, you wouldn't.
So instead of choosing Antonio Brown or Julio Jones in the first round, try going with Jake Butt. Or, if you're in a league that uses defensive players, you can't go wrong with Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (he's always good for an interception or two).
Don't draft Jerry Rice
Seriously. He's retired. Don't draft him or you'll be sorry.
Setting your lineup
After the draft, this can be one of the toughest things to do. You're set at kicker -- if you followed my advice -- so that won't be a problem. It's starting players at those other positions that can cause sleepless night and worrisome days.
An easy solution is to just not set the lineup, leaving it how it defaulted after the draft.
Bye weeks for players? Who needs 'em!
Injured stars? Leave 'em in there. You might be 0-8 but once the stars are healed and bye weeks are over, you're bound to pull off an upset or two. Not only will you likely ruin someone's playoff bid, but you'll look like a genius for pulling off the upset.
The right team name matters
This might be the most important part of any fantasy football season.
Here are a few examples:
- KellenMooreThanWords
- Pat Chung Tonight
- Turn down for Watt
- Feets like Shane Vereen
- Jason's Unreal Team
Some of the best team names are those automatically assigned to you. I mean, "Jason's Unreal Team" says so much that greatness is destined for your team of kickers, cool names, and not Jerry Rice.
Of course, you would substitute your name in place of Jason. Unless, of course, you'd like to name your team after me for all of this wonderful advice. Take it from me, it's worth it.
All that's left is for you to go get signed up and draft. Go get 'em tiger!
photo credit: flickr.com
To learn more: jason-haskins.com
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